“Children are like wet cement. Whatever falls on them makes an impression.” —Haim Ginott
Parenting has remained a critical factor in shaping, moulding, and ensuring the proper development of every Black young adult in readiness to confront life’s highs and lows. Providing guidance, direction, discipline, and counsel especially as this is perhaps the greatest and most important responsibility of a parent is crucial for the development of the next generation.
Today, not only do Black teens need the necessary tools and skills to contend with a fast-paced and changing society, but they also require the mental fortitude to navigate the reality of the everyday social and economic inequalities that exist in society, especially as this can take a toll on their psychological development.
This is where effective parenting becomes critical as a safety net to help young Black adults navigate the murky waters of life’s challenges. This can be tricky, as effective parenting must take into consideration not only the psychological aspects of the respective teen under their care but also their attitudinal and behavioural responses to specific scenarios to ensure that both the message and expected result are achieved.
Achieving a balance between independence and interdependence is crucial to ensure that young teens turn out to be wholesome individuals who over time can not only function in society but can also contribute to its development.
When it comes to finding that balance, Psychology professors have continued to proffer ideas on ways to approach such issues. Amongst one of these is Dr Conte, an American professor who proposes that there are 4 C’s every parent should keep in mind while raising children.
The Four C’s are Choices, Consequences, Consistency, and Compassion with each being as important as the next in the crucial development of young Black adults.
Laying the Foundation For Effective Parenting
The world is constantly evolving, and parenting tools that were successful in the 80s or 90s are likely obsolete or practically useless in this age and time. Effective parenting can open up both challenging and rewarding opportunities, and this is why every parent that hopes to provide the right foundation that guarantees the proper development of young Black adults under their supervision must take special care to continually update their knowledge and learn the required skill to offer their young teens the necessary guidance they need in dealing with life’s challenges.
When dealing with young Black male or female teens, a one-size model might not be applicable for either gender as several factors need to be taken into consideration based on their psychological or physiological makeup. It is why exploring parenting programs both offline and online helps in empowering parents with the knowledge, skills, and resources needed to equip them for the responsibility ahead.
Whether it is in your local church or support groups, parents can also explore experiences from community-based groups that they belong to as a means of deepening their skills in preparing them for effective parenting. The combined wealth of knowledge by fellow parents can be an invaluable resource as future reference.
Confronting Life’s Challenges
Effective parenting starts with understanding that at a point in the life of your child, your ability to influence your child’s developmental processes begins to meet challenges due to several social factors at play. Navigating or leveraging these factors as a tool of development is important for all parents to master.
As pointed out in the Art of Training Guide published by UNICEF, “experiences in the family unit are associated with positive parenting aids in the empowerment of children and focuses on the best interest of the child. However, one must be cognizant of the fact that in today’s society, family influence is fragile and in many instances, outnumbered by many other social forces. It is critical more than ever that families are aware of these social forces and use them to their advantage to be that fundamental environment for the growth and well-being of all its members and in particular children”.
When it comes to helping young Black teens make choices, it is crucial to first understand that the role of a parent at this stage is to appreciate that young Black adults are already developing unique personalities of their own and that the idea of constantly telling them what to do might be detrimental to their proper development.
Guiding them in understanding that not only are choices an inevitable part of human decision-making processes, but they also come with consequences that have long term influence over their development, while showing then available options open to them can help in making the right choices for themselves as well as ensuring their independence in addressing future life scenarios.
Another tool for effective parenting lies in building trust not just between yourself and your young teen but also in their abilities which can provide the needed confidence young Black adults need to deal with and confront whatever setbacks or challenges that they encounter.
As a result of the developmental growth of young Black teens today, many are ill-equipped with the psychological temperament to fully respond appropriately to positive or negative issues in a manner that does no further harm or impedes their progress. Parents in these situations have a role to provide reassurance of their capacity to weather every storm, especially in scenarios that threaten not only their confidence but can derail whatever successes that have been achieved over time.
While being a safety net for young Black adults it is vital to remember that the greatest example to emulate is the one exhibited by the parent in their approach to dealing with matters that affect both the families and themselves. As pointed out in the quote above, children are moulded by the investments made in their lives. Therefore effective parenting starts by acquiring the necessary skills and tools that will empower parents for the task at hand that ensuring they are successful in nurturing strong young Black adults equipped to impact society.

Okechukwu Nzeribe works with the Onitsha Chamber of Commerce, in Anambra State, Nigeria, and loves unveiling the richness of African cultures. okechukwu.onicima@gmail.com